A night of Alcohol and Songs

Actually wanted to blog a bit last night. Apparently, the alcohol hit me down. So I dozed off...

It was a friend's birthday party last night. It's held at a ktv pub. Plenty of songs and alcohol are expected. True enough. The birthday girl got a drop too much because everyone wants to toast to her( sound nice, actually, everyone is trying to make her drunk). It's like a culture to make the birthday person drunk. Why is that so? Hmm.. No idea.

Alcohol once a while is ok. Too much, it will make you sick. The same night, dizziness, puking. the moment you try to close your eyes and sleep, the head started spinning around like a merry-go-round out of control. Especially the next day morning. The hangovers can kill. Horrible feeling. Think about your liver that's suffering.

The after-effects of alcohol are so horrible. Why do we still drink? I believe it's because everyone seems to have this mindset that says, "I'm not so unlucky. It would happen to me. I'm only drink a little." Seems like we always wanna think thigns will never happen on us, until it smack hard into our faces. By then, it could already too late.

Drink in moderation. Easier say than done. Takes self-discipline to control ourselves. Lots of it.

Drinking drowns sorrows. Doubt so. The more you drink, the sadder you are. People just like to drown themselves in something. Please don't go drown yourself in the river, seas..etc Pollution.

"I realised that Mushroom cheese prata with curry+Super Sweet Teh Tarik+Bit of frozen Durian cake, topped up with Tiger Beer=A lousy combination to stomach in."

At this very moment... ...

I feel like crying. I really do... The tear ducts are stuck, or something. I felt a dull ache within my chest and deep in my heart. It's horrible to feel this way. I need to get it all out.

What is causing all these? Work? Ya, work. I'm not doing as well as I thought I should or I could. It's disappointing and demoralising. It's almost a month now. Whay are I still stumbling around? Where's my alertness? I seems to have lost my eye for details. Where are all the carefulness, efficency? Are they all left behind somewhere?

It's getting tiring. Friends said," Take it slow. Don't worry." It's not about the speed. It's just me and myself. I get very upset with myself when I'm not able to get things done well. My mind don't seems to be functioning that well. What happened? What happened?

I'm not working smart enough. I realised I kept saying that I can't do this, I can't do that. I don't believe in myself enough. If I don't believe in myself, then who will? Seriously in need of a change in mindset.

"Hold on tight. I'll pull through...I will... I must... I can..."

"Relationships are tougher than Maths", I say.

Maths. I dislike maths. I found it tedious. However, something else came along. Relationships. Man... It's even tougher than Maths. The whatever concepts, theories, methology of relationships, are so hard to grasp. Given a choice, I'll rather do Maths. At least Maths will have solutions to solve the problems. Relationships' solutions are usually not good enough.

"What is yours, will be yours. What will come, will come"

Was chatting with a girlfriend. Talking about giving each other space in relationship. For me, space is definitely important. Now, single, I have all the space I want, and sometimes, the space gets too empty. What will you do, when it gets empty? Friends will fill up the emptiness, but then it's not all the time. The feeling is different. Ultimately, it's what you actually wants at that point of time. Gotta compromise and make commitments and sacrifices. No escape. Weighing out the pros and cons of relationships. Back in school, teacher taught me that if you are unable to decide on something, can try out this method. List out the good and bad of each matter/thing, etc. Choose the one with the most goods. Does it usually works? I'm not too sure either. Didn't really try out...

Whatever the case, there's more than just relationships out in this world. There's so much to do. I guess, take life with a pinch of salt. Things might just fall into place neatly... Someday.. I hope.

"What is not yours, will never be yours" What doesn't meant to come, will never come"

(Idea of this blog came from cuteger. It hits the hearts of many.)

A Great night of Chatters & Laughters

It's the break of the dawn when I got home. The sky is bluish+greenish+yellowish+pinkish. It's a gorgeous mixture of colours. As I'm in no hurry to go anyway, I took my time to admire the sky, the people around. Aunties with disapproving eyes started at me in the train. Old folks jogging in the fresh aired park.

Now, with sleepy eyes and groggy brain, I attempted to recounted the great night I had with 2great friends. I could have wait till when I have enough sleep. But the words of thoughts are racing around in my brain like the cars that raced across Orchard Road after midnite.

We had yummy dinner to begin. A hungry person is an angry person. Since we are well-fed, our moods+temper are in excellent conditions.We attempted to catch a movie but there's none that interested us. Plan B: Play pool. Disappointing. No tables. Plan C: Chitchatting over after-dinner drinks. Done. Had great conversation. So, fun. Mr Exotic taught CuteGer how to play this dots & lines game. Quite interetesing. As the cafe is closing, we moved our chatters to Macdonalds. More fun & interesting chatters. Shared thoughts and experiences.
We all get to know each other more.

Mr Exotic was kinda distracted by the racing cars. So, we all went to watched the cars raced by. Apparently, there's no traffic police to chase after them. Hmm... Cool.

We decided to go home. So Mr Exotic left on his bike.

CuteGer and I carried on chatting. Hardly talk so much. This was such a good opportunity to catch up more while waiting for the morning train service.
Pereverts were everywhere. First there's old uncles staring as if we are there to sell ourselves. So, late already. Old uncles should be in bed. Then there's a bunch of crappy people of a particular race. Disturbing us, making rude comments. So irritating.Suddenly, there's this man from a foreign nationality. He was, well.... touching his manhood when he saw us. He started wanking a little, walking past us. So disgusting. I thought if he were to come over, I'll kick his bits and make sure he run all the way down Orchard Road without looking back. Gross! If My Exotic was around, guessed he might just tell him off.
(Unable to contiune anymore)

I realized my blog is mostly about negative thoughts.
But nowdays, it's turning into the arms of positivity.
Is that good or bad?

(ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ, tat will be it for now. Will update when I wake up later.

Sweet Dreams for now...(7.53am)

(11pm) Home from class, sweaty. Feels good to sweat it out. Time to post this entry.

WEEEE~~~~~

Rise & shine?

It's morning. Well, gonna be noon soon actually. I'm such a blur sotong. I was waken up by my alarm at 7am and I thought I'm gonna be late for work. Unsure about what day is today, I checked my calendar. Saturday, it says. What a relief. So, I dropped back into dreamland.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......

Here I am. Freshly out of sofa. Ya, sofa. I didn't sleep on my bed because I fell aslp reading and watchinv tv, as usual. Haven't been dreaming much lately. Sometimes it's good to dream, especially if it's a good one. I can relive it again and again in my mind. But horrible ones make me very tired when I wake up to a brand new day. I felt like I didn't even really sleep. Some of the horrible ones kept harassing my mind. It's so disturbing. And the worst part, the memory is so vivid. It seems like it had happened, or it's really gonna happen. No! They better not be. Because, it's always about dathe of someone who means a lot to me. That mustn't happen... No. Not that way.

Oh. Things are going way too negative. Mr Exotic will says,"Be more positive".
Dman.. I haven't been able to get him a nickname like Mr Alien. So that will have to do for now.
Gotta consult my "C&M CEO". (:p)

Oh! I know what positive stuff I can talk about. "C&M" What is all about? Well, the full name is "C&M Events Management". Actually, it's not a really company. Just a make-believe one. I believe this started last year December, because of X'mas. C is someone's name. M is someone's name too. So C & M decide to do some gift exhange thing for X'mas. So this make-believe" company is born. Who is this "C" & who is this "M"? Nope. I'm not telling. If you know, you'll know. If you don't, then you don't. :p

So what is C&M up to lately? Poor C&M almost split because they are separated. So sad. Luckily. The bonds held them together. Built a committee. In the process of starting a new event. Hopefully, a successful one. Maybe inject a little bit of surprise. Let's see what the committee will say. However, "M" is always missing out on the events which is quite disappointing. "M" should join in the fun more. "C" will be very happy.

Is "C&M" girls? Yup! They are 2 girls who met at work and are gel togetehr eversince. Thanks to fate. They weren't real colleagues in the first place. Then they became real colleagues. Thanks to fate again. They weren't real colleagues once again. Now, separated far apart. Lucky for them, there's technology: Email and phone.
People should be thankful to these 2 technologies.

WOW~ Long long story.
Hey Mr Exotic~ Is this positive enough? :p
*giggle*

So looking forward to meeting up with the rest of them. It's alwasy so fun to be with them. In the past, I never had friends so close to hang out with. Now I do. And I'm enjoying very moments of it. 'Quote Macdonald's "I'm Lov'in it".'

So, work. Neh.. Not talking about work today. It's a Saturday. What's the plan? No idea yet. Will find one somehow. Staying home to read books isn't that bad too. A friend is coming back from Taiwan. Yummy Sun biscuits~~
Alrite. That's it for now. Back to my book and magazines. They'll gonna grow mouldy n dusty if I don't read them.

When is the bell gonna ring?

Such a lame topic? No. The bell refers to school bell. Why school bell? Because I wish to go back to school and study again. Of course, there's no way to turn back the time and go back to past. Well, I still can go to school. Higher education. Both ideas sound good. But I was convinced by my mentor that 'A' will be better choice. The next intake was said to be in May. I have to hurry. There isn't much time to lose. I can't wait I guess.
Hurry~ Go back to school. Get the Cert and I'll be on my way soon~ Hurry~

(Change of topic)
New Title: A good meal = Yummy food and great meal buddies.
I had yummy food this whole week. Yummy food accompanied by great pals. Heavenly~
I used to not like raw salmon. I find it weird. Neither do I eat wasabi. Suddenly, no idea when, why and how. I started craving for raw salmon. Now, I have salmon-eating buddies too. It's so fun~
Talking about buddies. Haven't seen my dear lunch club members for quite a while. So sad. I miss them lots. We'll gonna have a great gathering soon I believe. It's in the process of planning and organising now. Who to invite along, where to go, what to do...etc
I'm sure it's gonna be fun. I'll make sure I'll take lots of photos. I love taking photos. For memory. So when I grow old, I can look back at the photos and remind myself, I had my fair share of fun. If I will to die then, I can die peacefully. (Touch Wood!!!)
I'm so in love with my dear lunch club members. All of them are so adorably, lovable. :p
They will be happy if they see what I said about them.
Someone said I shouldn't be talking about work. So... I'll still talk about work. :p It's my blog. I say what I want (caerfully of course. I'm a low risk taker).
Work's getting, well, I don't know. Bit by bit I guess. I wish I can pick up faster. My brain don't seems to be working as well as before. Lack of concentration? Too much thoughts? I better get myself into shape fast. Gotta fit in and do well. I'm a perfectionist (Maybe? Should be?) I get very upset if I can't get things done up to my expectations. I tend to set my expectations too high to reach I believe, resulting in big disappointments. Should take it easy.

Geez... Loook at the time now. Bedtime? Hear my bed calling? Oops! Kinda deaf now. :p Maybe later.. Maybe... In dreamland. A perfect world cooked up to my expectations.
My Perfect World. Just mine...

The world is round?

Isn't it strange that sometimes when you thought all will be gone and suddenly, they come back once again?
Be it people, objects, incidents..etc
I thought I lost it. But there it is. Just round the corner, waiting for me.
Is the world really round? What goes around, comes around?

What would it be like to be able to travel around the world? It definately would be an eye-opening experience. Lots of people have the same dream. But how many can actually pursue that dream? Even with the technology now, it wouldn't be enough compared to seeing stuff with your own eyes and experience the experiences. It would be tough I believe. Gotta be adventurous, street-smart and resourceful. Who's gonna fuel your dream other than yourself?
Striking lottery? Isn't that simple, right?

In this world of uncertainty, one doesn't know what will happen the next second. One might just passed on in the sleep, on the way to work, while eating..etc
If I have to go, I wanna go knowing I have done what I want to do. Go in peace. Right, it's getting creepy talking about passing on. Just have to be prepared. There's so much to do but so little resources.
One step at a time? Have to try. Trying, but maybe not hard and smart enough. It wouldn't be too late, I hope.

Oops! I heard my bed calling me. Time for a trip to dreamland. Good night...

Time always manages to slip away

Time is always so sliipery. No one ever can catch hold of it. A week has passed. By time I realised, it's already Saturday.

I have things that I always wanna do, but I can't. I'm sure it's
not just me. Hmm.. What are the things I wanna do, that I cannot do? Let's see...
-Perform on Esplanade Theatre (no way I can do that, unless I'm super rich. I can book the theatre for a night and dance on it myself. But that wouldn't be the same.)
-To be able to go overseas for holiday as and when I like ( No resources to do this either. Hopefully, in near future, I can do that. I'm such a country pumpkin. When was the last time I step out of S'pore? Some many donkey years ago... It's saddening. I couldn't see the world personally. Everyone is going holidays here and there. I'm forever stuck here.)

So far, these 2 are the things that have been swimming around in my mind for god-knows-how-long. Maybe someday, I'll be able to do just one of them.

I wanna see the Northern Lights. I wanna see more snow. I wanna see the mountains and valleys, the lakes and oceans. I wanan see the streets and roads. Of everyone other countries.

~To travel a thousand miles is better than reading a thousand books~

It's a Saturday. Supposed to be a fun day? The rain came and spoil mood of the beach and pool goers. Lucky for me. Ill hide indoors. I can feel a storm is coming. I love the wind. The rain beating on the face. Feel so refreshing.

My new book. Finally, my fave author released another new book of my fave series. I wished there's more than 1. I can get so engrossed that I can actually imagine the scenes vividly.
It's like a watching a live show in your mind. Beautiful.

Time to get back to my book.

It is what it is...

I don't know why the title. It just slipped into my mind silently and slided down onto my fingers and into the title bar.

Birdie flew away already I think... There haven't been chance to chirp together. Someone says, It's ok. Don't just hang onto a single Birdie. There's more and maybe even prettier...
It's tiring. Like in cartoon, when the character is dizzy, there's always little birdies flying around.

Work had been ok so far. Starting to have work to do. I'm glad. Bit nervous and worried. My brain is not that alert like before. Tired maybe. Distracted, I hope not.

We'll see.

I need new things to do to divert attention and spread the restlessness.
Studies. I need to study, more importantly, it's for a better future.

The new phase in life

Stepping into the new phase.
Someone commented, I looked more refreshed eversince I stepped into this new phase.
Really? I have much to learn. My supervisor said, I'm a fresh piece of paper. Very good to write on. I hope I can learn fast enough and do well just like how I did well in the previous environment.

A new phase in career.
What about relationship? Is it time for a new phase too? I'm not sure.
Hesistance. What am I waiting for? What am I worried of? What am I fearing?
I don't know...Mayve I just wanna run away. I don't wanna answer.
Sometimes, answers hurt.

*~*One day, He will grow wings. Fly off and maybe never gonna come back...*~*