Recent events

Other than the usual work, school and Taekwondo, actually there isn't really much.

I missed 'Garden in my heart' and Taekwondo on Friday(24Nov) due to a make-up class for Econs. Haiz...

I attempted flying side kicks again and again. I just can't do it well enough. Grading is on this coming Sunday(3Dec). Haiz...

My Statistics test. I didn't really prepare well enough... So I'll most probably gonna flunk the test. Haiz...

I heard about the packages my company had offered to new employees... Haiz...

Some nice event is coming up. Unbelievable, I've spent quite a bit on it. Haiz...

Some scary soul is back to haunt me. Please. Go away. Just go away. Haiz...

GST is going up, and salary is not. Haiz...

Is there nothing to look forward to happily daily?
The only goal I'm still hanging onto is completing my studies. Been slacking quite a bit. But I'm not too worry. I know when to buck up.

What were the goals I had set before? I have already lost sight of them.

Christmas is coming. But I don't feel the festive mood. Best part is, exams are just right after Christmas. I'm gonna spend my Christmas with my books. How sweet... Haiz...

2006 is ending soon. What have I achieved in this year? Anything meaningful? Memorable?

I just wish 2006 will go away happily and 2007 will come peacefully.

It's a rainy day again...

Ya, it's a rainy day again. Had a pretty chaotic day. They went on strike on me. Surprising, Delinquent didn't lead the strike. All managed to settle down by 6pm. Was not feeling pretty well.
Good thing is that, there's always something to look forward to almost everyday. Just the words, the sense of presence is enough. Is it really enough? Better not get too close. Too obssessed... Worried. Wondering. What is behind that mind? How to understand it? Is there even a mere chance of getting that close to understanding?
The journey to seek knowledge of understanding... Is so long...

It's a rainy day entry...

It's been raining the whole day. The air's so cooling. Refreshing. I'm sure the greens are appreciating the rain more than humans do.

Rainy days always bring thoughts. It seems that I always have some thoughts running round in my mind on rainy days. No idea why.

What kind of thoughts? Hmm... People. Past events. Future. Imaginating the impossible. Sweet and bitter.

Pondering over a question now. What am I? Ya, it's what am I, not who am I. Other than human being, what am I? What kind of person am I? I know I don't like to be lonely. I don't like to be left out. I like to be cared for. My horoscope says I'm attention-seeking. Am I? Well, sometimes I do, I guess. Ocassionally, I just wanna be the backdrop. It gets a little embarassing to be on the front sometimes. I cared for friends. I like to do little stuff to make them smile. Sometimes, in the process of it, I'll get myself fustrated and unhappy. When the end product is well-appreciated by them, only then you'll see smile on my face.

Reflecting on the past. I get very disppointed with myself. I'm sure I have disppoint lots more other people like my parents and mentors. It's scary. The little difference in thought and the decision changed my whole life. Often, I'll ask myself. What would I be now if I haven't made those decisions? I believe it might be whole lot better. Basking in the stage lights, and feeling the success by hearing the applauds. That was what started me towards Dance.
I made the choice to drop that. Maybe I'm just too lazy? Maybe Dance wasn't my passion after all? Maybe I don't make the cut? Maybe and maybes...

Now, it's a start, all over again. To start is tough. To re-start is even tougher. Can you imagine how much effort and courage I have to gather to make this re-start? It wasn't easy. Nothing is easy. Lucky for me, although I have 'friends' who pretended they cared and all the while discouraging me, I made some true friends along the way.
You don't know how gladful I am. I don't know how else to let them know other then putting in all my best and making things work for myself.

It gets tiring after a while. They are my motivation. My fuel. The momentum must not stop. Once it stops, it will be hard to get it rolling again.

What about love? Somebody told me Love, Feel are realistic... I felt otherwise. All these dreamy stuff like love, romance, feel, chemistry..etc are all idealistic. Not gonna say they are unrealistic. They are there all the time. It's like a bonus to have them. Well, at least I feel so.
I do believe in one thing, chemistry. For me, no chemistry, no love. Akalline and akalline.. Not much of a reaction do they? Acid and akalline, gives you water and a salt. That's why they say opposite attracts.
Relationships are not that important now... When I was younger, I feel I need a relationship. Not that I don't want one now. Back then was more like a need. :p
Now, it's more like a want. I will survive without or without one.
Nowadays, guys are so hard to understand. Seems to be playing mind games like girls used to do. Bad karma.
It's like not here, not there. Then where? Where?

Study study study... Don't think so much... What is mine is mine. What will come will come.

Unreasonable act

Ya, another day has gone by. Time really flies.

Today, was in the bus to class. Woah! There's this little incident. The bus driver jammed his brakes, and a poor lady tried to balance herself thus accidentally step on this old man's foot.

AI YO~~~~~

I thought what...

The lady apologized. But what did the old man says? He said there's no use saying sorry. Already stepped on his foot, no point saying sorry... He told the lady she should step on his foot harder so that it breaks. He says, go kill someone and says sorry later. No use right?

I feel he's being unreasonable. Old man can get pretty cranky. There's more to come. He wouldn't let the lady off. He kept repeating the same stuff adding in hokkien vuglarities. He even said, the poor parents bore this daughter no use one. The CCB... Very pain... And more CCB.

So unresonable. Don't have to drag her parents in right? And in the public, threw vuglarities at a poor lady who already apologized. I'm so tempted to pat her hand and give an understanding look. Tempted to tell the old man off. Best part, her boyfriend was just standing there like a woodblock.. All the while keeping quiet.. OMG... How can this be?

I believe they got off earlier than they should so that they can get away from that cranky old man. The poor lady was almost crying. Poor thing...

Anyone witnessing this unreasonable will most probably felt like I did. Pity the poor lady. It's just a minor accident. Don't have to say until as if she kills his whole family. Swearing at a poor lady in public.. Gross...

Should I be in the lady's shoes, I might just oblige to his request of breaking his toes... Idiot.
Respect elders mah. So respect his request lor. Lame right? Ya, I know.

I definately will tell him off.

Better not see this cranky mad man again... Gross...